The interactions between teachers, parents, and school administrators are critical in the complex education system, where students’ intellectual and emotional development is the shared goal. Ideally, these relationships should be grounded in mutual respect, understanding, and a shared vision for the student’s best interests. However, reality often diverges from this ideal. In schools across the globe, administrators and parents frequently find themselves on opposite sides of an ever-widening communication gap, with both parties sometimes making outrageous statements that challenge logic and reason. These exchanges, which range from the hilariously absurd to the disturbingly inappropriate, reflect one of the biggest reasons teachers are fleeing the field of education and the deep-seated absurdity that the school environment can call forth.
Below is a series of real quotes from parents and administrators. For each quote, try to determine whether it was a parent or an administrator who said it. The answers are at the bottom.
Note: Some basic language in the quotes has been changed, so you cannot tell if a parent or administrator said it. For example, “my son” has been changed to “the student.”
- “Maybe you should bake them muffins and offer them as a reward for good behavior. I recommended apple cinnamon.”
- “Let her sniff Mr. Sketch markers throughout the day to help her focus.”
- “ ‘Brian’ didn’t get the lead in the show, but he really wants it. Can you add a second weekend so he can play the lead, too?”
- “You finally look pretty. I didn’t know you could.”
- “You’re speaking too much Spanish in class. It is turning off the children to learning.” (It was a Spanish class.)
- “I think your mental health gets in the way of your teaching.”
- “Let him have his cell phone out during exams because it helps with his (undocumented) anxiety.”
- “Is it possible to plan a petting zoo party inside your classroom with live animals like goats?”
- “If you make your class decor instead of buying it, everyone will know you love the children.”
- “He is misbehaving and disrespectful toward you because you are female, and he has issues with women in authority positions.”
- “I’m sorry that your mother died, but we are all going through something.”
- “Stop teaching about the First Amendment because some kids are acting out because of it.
- “Don’t you have a teenage son?” (After the teacher complained about a student watching porn on a Chromebook and masturbating in the classroom.)
- “He got a D on a math test, but we told you he can’t fail.”
- “You are probably going to die early.”
- “Just stand next to her and keep asking her if she needs help for the whole class.”
- “Give extra hugs to this student.”
- “I’m sorry your son is struggling to breathe. Is it possible to have your husband take him to the hospital instead of you?”
- “Please sit with the student in the classroom (when the class is out for recess) because the sun is too bright.”
- “The water fountain isn’t enough. Please provide them 5 gallon water jugs.”
- “Let the student swear if he needs to. Just have him go into the bathroom (in the classroom) and say all the potty words, then flush them away.”
- “There is a glare on your whiteboard. Can’t you just move it?” (The sun? No. The whiteboard? It’s nailed into the wall.)
- “I know your mother died, but who will take them to the track meet?”
- “Why do you have to be out for so long? You didn’t have the baby! Your wife did!”
- “During the pandemic, parents did the work of teachers for no pay, which is illegal.”
Answer key:
- Parent
- Parent
- Parent
- Admin.
- Parent
- Admin.
- Parent
- Parent
- Admin.
- Parent
- Admin.
- Parent
- Admin.
- Parent
- Admin.
- Parent
- Parent
- Admin.
- Parent
- Parent
- Parent
- Parent
- Admin.
- Admin.
- Parent