Skip to Content

Funny Hall Passes

Funny Hall Passes


Every school handles hall passes in a different way. Some will go the standard route with a laminated card or a lanyard. Some schools mandate a teacher’s signature in an official school agenda book, while others make the student wear a neon orange or yellow vest with the room number. Some schools allow teachers to choose an object to give to students as a hall pass and some teachers take this opportunity to embarrass their students and have some fun. 

Here is a list of real hall passes teachers have used:

An actual toilet seat (just in case you need an extra)

A mannequin leg

A rotting plantain 

A giant cinderblock (though it was confiscated by admin. because it could be used as a weapon)

A sign on a lanyard that says, “I have explosive diarrhea.” (How badly do you have to go, kid?)

A rubber rat on a leash (because it’s a funny image to see a kid walking a rat on a leash through the hallways and teachers are desperate for laughs)

A sign that just says “poop” on it 

A screwdriver (This seems like a bad idea to me. See the earlier note about the cinderblock being used as a weapon)

A toaster

An old bowling pin

A giant cardboard cutout of Burt Reynolds’ head, Britney Spears, a bear, Bob Ross, the teacher’s head

A globe

A pumpkin

A squash

An etch-a-sketch

A sandal

A giant biology skeleton

An upright bass

A life jacket

A giant bottle of hand sanitizer

A snowboard

An old printer

A huge hazard cone

A fake Christmas tree

A red cape the student must wear that says, “Pee, poop & away!”

A huge, old, heavy computer monitor

A baby car seat

A huge jar of dirt

A creepy old naked baby doll

A creepy old baby doll head

An oar

A life jacket

A surfboard

A baby stroller

An iron block

A huge bottle of hand sanitizer

A cactus

A bicycle wheel

A skeleton foot

A mop with the wheelie bucket of soap and everything

A 5-foot-long, 40-pound block of wood that he carved “Hall Pass”

A toilet plunger

A laminated poster of Cardi B, but it says, “Cardi Pee” on it

A large wooden crab that says, “I’ve got crabs”

A huge, old painting

Attention! Some of the links present in this article may be affiliate links. This means that if you make a purchase through the link, we might generate a small commission (at no extra cost to you!). Additionally, as an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases made through the links. All of this revenue goes back into Teacher Misery and the mission of improving it and the lives of teachers everywhere. As always, thank you for all your support! :)))

Jane Morris

Jane Morris is the pen name of an ex-teacher who would really like to tell you more about herself but is worried awful administrators will come after her for spilling their dirty little secrets. Jane has taught English for over 15 years in a major American city. She received her B.A. in English and Secondary Education from a well-known university and her M.A. in Writing and Literature from an even fancier (and more expensive) university. As a professional queen of commiseration turned published author, Jane’s foremost passion in life is to make people laugh through the tears.

She has written several highly acclaimed books unpacking the reality of teaching and life inside the school system. You can view her full library of works here.